Welcome to the New Weeaboo Stories, picking up where old Weeaboo Stories Left off!
Please read the rules before submitting your stories,
thank you! ~ Mod D
Submit Anon: Pretentious
This is a short but hilarious story. (Warning: If you take your favorite anime seriously then don’t read this post.)
So I was at a con last year and I was sitting in on a panel where a guy complained about anime he didn’t like and thought were bad and pretentious and whatnot. At some point, he asked the audience what anime we thought were pretentious.
When he asked this of the audience I couldn’t help but want to ruffle some feathers because damn this guy was taking his anime so seriously and so was his audience of fanboys. So, I raised my hand and with a big grin on my face said “Elfen Lied”.
The room went silent and a couple of people coughed, and one girl like several rows in front of me turned FULL AROUND IN HER SEAT just to GLARE at me. It was this really hideous, puggy, silly glare that really was quite comical. (This is not to say she was ugly in any way- She was simply making that kind of face). She very much wanted me to know that she was angry and that she was staring at me. The panel continued and the guy running it said he never saw Elfen Lied and asked if it was pretentious, but the rest of the audience said NOTHING. Three minutes or more later, the girl is STILL giving me this hilariously angry and quite comical glare and boy did she want me to notice. I just smiled brightly back at her and she scrunched up her face even more, so finally I said in my cheeriest voice “Personal opinion”. So then she scoffed a bit and shrugged before finally turning back to face the panel, and I was still grinning from ear to ear and quite proud of myself.
The panel then continued on with the guy going on about what a great series Sword Art Online was and how much better it was than .hack and I had to restrain myself from all the laughter threatening to spill from my lungs.
All in all, a hilarious panel experience.
Getting manhandled by cosplayer’s weebish friends
So, I’ve been following the blog for quite a long time now, and I’ve got a tale to tell. Sorry this one will be short and not too exciting, but it’s probably the closest thing I got to a “weeb encounter”.
It happened, maybe 2-3 years ago? At a con in the city near me. It was a fairly new con, but is growing quickly. (This year will be it’s 5th year I believe?) Anyway, due to being broke, the only cons I could attend where one within the metropolitan area, and this con was one of them. At the time Black Butler was in it’s 2nd season and had regained some popularity. I had gone with 2 of my friends. I had just received my Claude cosplay and wanted to break it in. There were other Claude cosplayers there but apparently I was the best one, despite not having a wig at the time. So we arrived there early, got our badges, and were hanging outside since panels and such didn’t start till a little later. I was sitting by my friends when 3 girls came up to me. They will simply be know as A, B, and C.
Submit Anon: It’s Just a Joke
Here is a little back story which pertains to the main event: I went out to lunch with my best friend and upon signing the receipt, I wrote my first name twice instead of first and last name. My best friend thought this was hilarious and laughed really hard for about fifteen minutes before squealing, “It sounds like a bad anime nickname!” She then said my first name twice and added “Senpai” onto the end of it. As of today, my Facebook name is my first name twice, with Senpai, and then my last name. It’s just a joke. My friends and I do not use any Japanese titles with each other seriously.
Here is the main story:
My name in this story will be “Dog.”
Friend One is “Fish Guy.”
Friend Two is “Bro.”
The weeaboo is “Garlic.”
I made something for my favorite blog because my anime club is full of weebs
(You know the rules with videos guys)
MadThad 2.0 in the making, folks
Creepy Weeb from OKCupid can’t take no for an answer
So, this story starts on OKCupid, the breeding ground for inappropriate, creepy men, and how I met the creepiest, most inappropriate one of the bunch. Oh, and of course he is a weeaboo.
He messaged me with “Hi :)” and I checked out his profile. His pictures were of him in Assassin’s Creed and Ash Ketchum cosplay and he said some pretty weird ass shit on his page like “i will always be there for my friends no mather what, after all…i made a promise to her that i would…” and about he is the “nicest person you will ever meet”, how he is a Pokemon master, etc etc. I thought it was weird but whatever, I’d try to talk to him.
On my profile I have it set to “Looking for: Friendship, Short Term Dating, and Casual Sex”, but he only seemed to be interested in a friendship with me, thank God. We talked for a while about anime and cosplay and stuff and he was actually pretty pleasant and normal, so we added each other on Facebook. He was normal at first but then things got weird.
How I Met a Weeaboo
It was a few weeks ago when I happened upon the r/weeabootales, which led me to here, and I immediately became hooked. I’ve had a few choice encounters of my own and decided to share one today.
VP: Vice President of Anime Club P: President of Anime Club
A: Girl of my Brief Affections
My Parents figured that the best hobby for a bored midwestern 12 year old would be to learn a new language. I still down know why they picked Japanese (they’re both ethnically Indian), but by the time I was 16 I was marginally fluent in it. The twist here is that I barely associate myself with Japanese culture, none of my (primarily Indian) friends did either, and the only anime I had watched with any seriousness was Dragon Ball Z (didn’t even know what Hetalia was until I started reading r/weeabootales).
Submit Anon: Why NOT to Cosplay as Len!
Friend 1: Miku
Friend 2: Kaito
Friend 3: Meiko
Friend 4: Luka
We went as these characters.
So I was in 8th grade, and had just started dating Rin (still am) and we were really into Vocaloid, and so were my friends, espicially my best friends Miku and Kaito. The six of us decided that we wanted to go to a convention, and we decided that we’d go as the ‘Main’ Vocaloids. (Miku, Rin, Len, Luka, Kaito, and Meiko.) We all made our costumes and they all looked pretty nice. We had all bought wigs, ‘cept for Meiko, because she already had simmilar hair to Meiko’s. The first day went off without a hitch. We all hung out together and got asked for some pictures. Now, I’d heard rumors of Cons and Hambeasts, but I didn’t think they were telling the truth. It seemed that I was right because no Hambeast disturbed us. The group got 2 different rooms in a hotel that were connected, because we had planned to spend three days there. On the second day, it was like the first day, except for one point straight in the middle of it. I was just talking to my friends, when suddenly I smell something like what would happen if you mixed skunk spray and sweat. Then somebody grabs on to me from behind and screams, “LEN-TANNNNNNN.” I actually fell down, crumbling to their weight. Once I had gotten up, I looked behind me. Before me stood the definition of a hambeast. Greasy hair, smell and stained ‘cosplay’ all pointed it out. She was a ‘Rin,’ I think. She had a shitty wig and a Kagemine Rin shirt on, spouting something mostly english, but with some broken Japanese mixed in. All I understood was, ’ Watsahi wa trying to find cosplay as good as watashi. You have cosplay just as good as watashi-chan.’ Then she saw Rin and said, ‘Ditch that baka for kawaii loli watashi-chan.’ Me and my friends are all thinking that she’s mentally insane weeaboo, which she was. I told her, “I already have a girlfriend and am not looking for someone. Especially not at an anime convention.” Then sjhe freaked out and pulled me away from my friends and putting my face against her boobs and saying, “Does that feel good?” I would have normally punched her in the face, but she got me stuck. Then she took it too far.
She started reaching her hand down into my boxers and I just freaked out and tried to knee her in the stomach, but I couldn’t, because I was stuck.
But everything was fine after that because the security came in and took her off of me with about 3 people. She then got arrested. The con was ruined for that day, but the next day, Rin helped me have fun, but I was still traumatized, and to this day, still haven’t worn that Len cosplay. It’s been a year since then.
Apparently constructive criticism of Japanese cartoons warrants such responses.
Submit Anon: Well… This Exists, You Guys.
Okay, so I was on dA, you know, like the loser I am… and I came across some *coughcough* interesting artwork. I’m not gonna give any links, the person’s username, or any pictures because I don’t want to humiliate the person. But anyway, this is the actual, legit description of the post. I am dead serious.
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